


Diners, Drive-Ins, and Diving Into the Abyss of Love

by orphan_account



Category: Diners Drive-ins and Dives, Real Person Fiction
Genre: F/M, Love/Hate, Mean Characters, OR IS IT, Secret Relationship, Workplace Relationship, please...this is a joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-13
Updated: 2014-11-13
Packaged: 2018-02-25 07:10:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2612864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Guy Fieri, host of Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives is forced to have a co-host with questionable motives because of low ratings, how will they be able to deal with one another? He's wholesome, easily embarrassed, and eager to please; she's smart-mouthed, clever, and has a dark secret. WIP.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Diners, Drive-Ins, and Diving Into the Abyss of Love

The phone rang at exactly 10 PM. Shay pulled the cellular device from her back pocket, half-interested in whoever it could be. It was either her obsessive ex or her manager, and she was definitely hoping it was the latter. Her ex, Bradley Cooper, was as annoying as he was handsome. Ugh. No, she didn't want to think about him now. She glanced down at the glowing screen. It read 'MANAGER!' with a series of knives and gun emojis. Shay slid her finger to the right and answered the call. "Yes?" she asked impatiently. 

"Uh...uh," he started, voice anxious as ever. "John Johnson, your manager here."

Shay rolled her eyes. "I know, I have caller ID. So? What do you want, John? Did you really have to interrupt me in the middle of a facial?" she asked, picking up a Dorito with a manicured nail and shoving it into her mouth. So she wasn't really getting a facial. Big deal.

"So sorry, miss, really, you know I am. I have a job opportunity for you. You're gonna love it!" 

"That's what you said about the last one."

John was silent for a moment. That's what she thought. The last so-called 'opportunity' he had for her was a live children's TV show, and she guessed he should have known better than to put her around a bunch of kids on live TV. One had bitten her on the leg and she struggled not to punt it across the room. Shay looked down at the skin on her calf--she still had a scar! A series of swears had left her mouth and she was never invited back. It was hard being a TV show host, and she was looking for something steady. Shay was tired of hosting 50 Funniest Stupid Assholes on truTV. And even though she got to dress up in the nicest little cocktail dresses, she was also tired of taking Christian Millian's job as the girl who talked to C-list teen celebrities during the Teen Choice Awards. California was getting boring and she wanted to travel.

"Yes, and, um, this one is actually super great. I'm serious, miss. Why don't you come down to the office tomorrow and we'll talk about it? Good luck on your facial--I hate when it gets in my hair," he said, his laugh sounding more like a squeal. Gross.

It was Shay's turn to be quiet. She wanted him to bask in his own dirty joke. He deserved it for the latest gigs he was giving to her, she thought, shoving another Dorito into her mouth and then rubbing her cheese finger on her six thousand dollar blanket. John was an asshole. 

His ugly laugh turned into a series of nervous hiccups. "Okay, sorry 'bout that last one. But seriously, you're gonna love it. You can travel all over America--I know how you've been wanting to do that. It's a brand new job. You won't be replacing anyone, Shay, and you can set the bar for this. America will love you."

It sounded _good._ It was rare that she wasn't standing in for anyone, and being the first person to do a job in the entertainment industry meant that she would be the standard everyone else after her would have to uphold to. _Perfect._ She was silent for only a second more. "Fine, but I hate you. See you tomorrow, John. Have the trail mix out on the table for me--no raisins," she quickly added, and then hung up the phone.

Shay snuggled into her expensive blanket and set her eyes on the TV. Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives was playing on the television, and she let the soothing sound of Guy Fieri's ecstatic voice lull her into a deep sleep. She'd have a lot of work to do tomorrow.

**Author's Note:**

> Woo-hoo! My first fic. Rating is definitely subject to change--it's only the first chapter ;) Guess who she meets in the next chapter!


End file.
